Famous Chocolate Chip Cookies of Fame

Dearests: I have ever been on the lookout for the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe. Tollhouse cookies, bless them, always ALWAYS come out flat as pancakes and crisp like crackers for me. No idea why. And this will not do. I want soft and chewy and gooey.

Well, my search is over! From a good friend comes a perfect recipe: soft and chewy, mounded with chocolate chips–white and semi sweet–delicious flavor, perfect crumb. In short, YUM-baby.

Now, before I launch into the recipe I want you to brace yourselves. Sit down. Get a cuppa cocoa. Breathe–Innnnnn, ouuuuuut, innnnn, ouuuuuut. Go to your happy place. Why?

Because this recipe has margarine in it.

I KNOW! The bane of the palate of every eater-of-discerning-taste. The carcinogenic concoction of carnivorous cream-like clotted crude. MARGARINE! That against which I have ranted since the inception of this blog. Can't be helped. Only way it works. So suck it up, my dearests! It is worth it.

Let us begin:

Famous Chocolate Chip Cookies of Fame

2 cups margarine (The pain I feel at typing this cannot be described . . .)

2 cups brown sugar (This almost makes up for the congealed crude-oil.)

1 1/2 cups white sugar

3 eggs 2 tsp. vanilla

1 1/2 tsp. baking soda

1 1/2 tsp. salt

6 cups flour

1 package milk chocolate chips (Except I only believe in semi-sweet)

1 package of any other flavor (We tend toward white chocolate chips)


Cream margarine and sugars. Add eggs, vanilla, soda, and salt. Mix for 3-4 minutes (This is important. Not sure why. It just is. Something to do with a change in the chemical structure. But I majored in English. I don't do Chemistry. Just do it please.)

–Add flour and mix. –Add chocolate chips. –Spoon onto cookie sheets (I use a cookie dough scooper thingie. Makes them all uniform. Then the OCD in me is satisfied.)

–Bake at 350 degrees for 10-12 minutes. (You want these just slightly underdone. Not enough to start a salmonella epidemic; just enough to remain soft and mounded up. They should not be browned, except maybe a bit on the edges. Mostly set, but not completely. Have I said this enough? Please do not overbake.)

Pictures, AND . . . a Movie!

Sugars, with a bit o' marg–ack! Marger– yeesh, I can't type it. MARGARINE! There.
Creaming the fat and sugars. Fat doesn't sound better, does it?
Eggs and vanilla and all the good stuff that eventually turns this sweet fatness into cookies.

What's a Food! Feats! recipe without a live-action segment taken on an iPhone by a blogger who can't remember to turn the thing sideways? Here you go, lovelies: The Mixing. Soon in theaters near you: stirring plot, mushy love story, oozing with corruption  . . .  You don't want to miss it!
The essential chocolate added. Then scooped onto cookie sheet. Then popped into oven. Until . . .
Magnificent! I'm going to blow this up and hang it on my wall. Once you taste these, you will forget there was anything at all wrong with the ingredients list.
Run, my little poppets! Grab some milk! Eat, and be free!
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